~ Jimmy Innuendo ~

Jimmy Innuendo


There’s a guy standing outside of  “Asleep and Places Like It,” trying to get you to come in . . .

(SFX Calliope music swells. Narrator in barker-type  voice:)

Narrator as Barker: “Electric Edward, ladies and gents! Here he is!  Electric Edward!  Hurry, hurry hurry!   Step right up, step right up! Who’ll be next to shake him by the hand? Only costs a nickle! So, hurry, hurry, hurry! He’s unbelievable! He’s amazing! He’s elec-trifying! He’s ELECTRIC EDWARD!

Here he is, folks . . . your opportunity to experience, “first hand,” the wonder of the new Age of Electricity!

You know what I’m talking about! Electricity!!  Boom!! Crackle!!  Bolts of Lightning! That ethereal fluid that flows through the earth like a great dragon!

Step right up, folks, and grasp the lightning from the sky . . . if you dare try! Feel that primeval power for yourselves! Produced for you upon this stage by means of a harmonious blending of beauty and efficiency. . . a gracefully woven sphere of gleaming copper wire which we set to spin inside a perfectly circular ring of magnets! Listen to that little beauty hum! Touch the lightning from the sky! If you dare try!

Step up, step up and take him by the hand. . . if you can! Who’ll be next? Who’ll be next? Only costs a nickle!

These elemental bolts will make your hair stand on end! Your eyes will bug out, your body will tremble violently all over! It’s wonderful!! So . . . who’ll be next? Hi, there, young man! Only costs a nickle! Thanks, son! Now . . . all you have to do is . . .step up to Edward here . . walk up to him, that’s right! Now, grasp him firmly by the hand and say, “Hello, Edward!” while I pull this switch! Ready? Here we go!”

(SFX Voice: “Hello, Edwa . . .” cut off by a loud crackling burst of humming electricity)

Narrator’s Normal Voice: There were a few seconds of electrical humming and crackling, an eerie blue light of jumping sparks, and the strong tang of ozone. The barker peered closely at the writhing teenager, whose right hand was clamped in a friendly but desperate grip with the hand of the cheereful brass torso. He was looking for danger signals such as wisps of smoke or signs of searing from metal framed glasses.

(From Electric Edward)

Thanks to ©Robert E Potter III REP3 for most of the excellent photographs in this site!